Me at five: gangly and tall (even then) at least one skinned knee (at all times) curious and anxious (all at once). Ready to challenge the world around me.
I like to think of the five-year-old version of me as the essence of who I am. Before I fully learned all the lessons that gender socializing would have to teach me: be cautious, don’t be too much, the world won’t always embrace what you have to offer.
At that age, I was precocious. I was NOT thinking about playing it safe.
Why would I? I was, after all, invincible. 😊
As we’ve kicked off National Women’s History month, I’ve thought a lot about myself at five years old. What was her essence? What mattered most to her? If I could talk to her today, what wisdom would she have for me?
To find out, I tried a guided visualization exercise. In it, I visited my five-year-old self so that we could have a chat. I could really picture her. Messy hair, freckles, hand-me down clothes, scuffed saddle shoes. The look in her eyes: sadness, yes. But also, deep curiosity and a familiar sense of determination. I asked her for her thoughts.
She looked at me with frank appraisal, not used to being asked her opinion. “I will be the boss,” she told me. There was a hint of a question in her comment, so I nodded reassurance. “And, I can run the world,” she added emphatically. Then she handed me something.
It was a coffee mug.
It was my dad’s preferred mug growing up. An exemplary piece of 70’s tableware, light tan with three stripes of variated brown painted across the bottom of it. Every day it sat on the desk of his home office, harboring cups of steaming Earl Grey as he built his financial planning business. In my five-year-old mind, this wasn’t just any mug.
It was the boss’ mug.
She’d thrust it at me and then stood waiting for my response. Did I get it? Would she become the boss? Again, I nodded. “Don’t worry,” I told her. “You will make the life you want.”
Eyes open and back in my own home office, I thought about the wisdom she had given me. I felt bolstered. She reminded me of what it looks like to overcome adversity and stand with unbridled confidence. She reminded me of what a boss I can be.
Women’s History Month is an important time for reflection and celebration.
How do we honor the accomplishments of the women who have come before us?
Where can we push the envelope of what’s possible for ourselves?
Who can we support in their own endeavors to be a boss?
Please join me (and my inner five-year-old girl boss) in the discussion. Because when women support each other, they are unstoppable!